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8 Dating Rules For Single Dads

The problem with recently divorced single parents
is that are waiting too long to start dating
again, complaining they are oh, so busy. The real
reason is their fears, because their previous
situation was usually so ugly, they don’t have a
strong enough ego to let rejections roll off
their back.

Even if they are starting to date, in most cases
are doing this for the wrong reasons. Some single
parents think they are in competition with their
ex, particularly if they were left for a younger
partner. They also might be playing a game to
prove to the ex that they are desirable by dating
as many people as possible. In a nutshell, don’t
date for emotional revenge, to allay feelings of
loneliness or to prove your desirability to
others.

After a divorce, both parties are tented to
change partners almost every week or month and
are not in the mood to compromise with somebody.

But after a while especially single fathers are
feeling the need to have a life partner and a
mother for their children.

If you are a single father and you are determined
to find someone for a long time relationship you
have to be sure that you are making the best
choice because now you are not alone, you are
making the choice not only for you but for your
children too.

There are some gold rules to consider that can
help you to find the best second mom for your children
and the best soulmate for you:

1. As there is no surer turn-off for a potential
partner than a person who insists on living in the
past, make a rule for yourself that you are going
to do your absolute best not to drag the past
into new relationships.

2. Your kids are the priority of your life; keep
them there no matter what!

3. You have been careful to prepare your kids for
the fact that you will have a life other than the
one with them. But don’t forget to make them
understand that they will not lose your love,
just some of your time together.

4. Choose to date some women that have at least
one kid already. A woman without children may
not understand you and your children needs and
may not have too much patience. Don’t forget
that children are the best when it is about to
exasperate somebody, and in the first stage your
new date will be like a target for your kids jest.

5. Don’t leave your partner to baby-sit. In order
to keep children safe, it is necessary to be able
to discipline them. It is too soon for your
partner to discipline your children.

6. In conflict situation try to put yourself in
your partner place, be diplomatic with your child
and try to be impartial. Find the golden mean to
resolve the problems between them.

7. Never chose your mate only because she is
getting on well with your child. You have to find
someone FOR YOU and YOUR CHILD. Remember that the
best for your children is and will ever be their
natural mom, the women you just have divorced (
for some good reasons I believe). So find a woman
that you are attracted to, a woman you find
interesting AND that is willing to accept your
children too.

8. Pay attention to her children too, and never
forget that they are the priority of her life.

52 Free Things To Do With Your Spouse On Date Night

One of the things that works to keep marriages alive is spending quality time with each other. In this day of the information age, it is becoming increasingly difficult to carve out the necessary time to nurture our spouses. What with long work hours, helping kids with their homework, transporting them around to their extracurricular activities, getting dinner, cleaning up and going through the bedtime routine, what time is left?

Unless you orchestrate the time for your marriage, other less important things will crowd in and take what precious little time you do have. Pick a night that will be “date night” with your spouse and make a game out of being as creative as you can be. Try to see how many things you can do without spending money.

To get you started, I’ve come up with some suggestions to help you for the next year. What follows are 52 ideas for how to spend creative time together without spending money. Feel free to add or modify any of the items on the list to suit your particular marriage and circumstances.

WINTER

1. Take a drive to look at the Christmas decorations.
2. Play cards—perhaps strip poker.
3. Watch a movie together.
4. Go outside and have a snowball fight.
5. Get some finger paints and create your own body art with each other as your canvass.
6. Go sleigh riding.
7. Go ice skating.
8. Work out or exercise together.
9. Stage your own improvisation show.
10. Sing to each other.
11. Review or create a photo album or scrapbook of your memories together.
12. Play a board game—perhaps chess, Scrabble or Twister.
13. Go to a book store, get coffee and read for hours.

SPRING

14. Work on a remodeling project together.
15. Plan and complete a yard work project together.
16. Do the spring cleaning together—room by room. When done, reward yourself by making love in the room you’ve cleaned.
17. Put on old clothes and mud wrestle after some drenching rain.
18. Give each other a massage.
19. Play catch—football, baseball, softball or Frisbee.
20. Go to a car dealer and test drive the car of your dreams.
21. Shoot basketball together.
22. Dance together.
23. Take a shower together and wash each other—everywhere.
24. Take a free adult education class together.
25. Go to a mall and have a contest to see which one of you can get the most free samples.
26. Go rollerblading or bike riding.

SUMMER

27. Build a campfire and roast marshmallows.
28. Go swimming or skinny dipping.
29. Give each other a manicure or pedicure.
30. Go somewhere crowded to people watch.
31. Go to a free outdoor event, perhaps a concert.
32. Lie on a blanket outside and watch the clouds or stars.
33. Go on a picnic.
34. Watch a fireworks display.
35. Be creative and engage in sexual role plays. Be anyone you’d like to be for the night who is also exciting for your spouse.
36. Sit by the water somewhere.
37. Do a prolonged strip tease for each other.
38. Have a water balloon fight.
39. Sit outside and read poetry to each other.

FALL

40. Go for a drive together.
41. Go window shopping.
42. Incorporate food into your love making—chocolate syrup, whipped cream, fondue, strawberries—anything you and your spouse enjoy.
43. Call or write to someone you haven’t had contact with in a while.
44. Cook something together.
45. Spend an evening just talking with each other. Talk about the things you have done, plans you have for the future, important people in your lives or current events.
46. Take a bubble bath together.
47. Go to a free movie or museum.
48. Take a drive and find the potential in old houses and their properties.
49. Create an imaginary story together—either orally or in written form.
50. Take turns being each other’s genie in a bottle by fulfilling your spouse’s every wish and fantasy.
51. Play in the fallen leaves.
52. Create an exciting scavenger hunt that ends in your bed.

Now you have 52 suggestions for things to do with your spouse for every week of the year divided by season. Certainly you don’t have to follow my suggestions. Feel free to add your own or to repeat your favorites as often as you’d like.

The main point is not to see how kinky you can get. The idea is to keep your marriage alive by making time together a priority. It is important that you find things to do as a couple that you can both enjoy. If you have vastly different interests then you can enter this with the spirit of taking turns and each agree to happily participate in the activity chosen by the one whose turn it is that week.

As long as you make a habit of making your spouse a priority and allocating time each week for rejuvenation of the feelings that attracted you in the first place, then you stand a good chance of staying together for the long haul.

Please don’t let insidious boredom enter into your marriage through the back door. This is what frequently happens when we are busy placing other things ahead of our time for each other. You know what I mean—the job, the kids, our friend in crisis, etc. There will always be a competing interest for the time you’ve set aside for each other.

Other than natural disasters, threat of death or major crises, do not allow your time together to be invaded by any outside forces. Make sure to create opportunities for you to do things together without outside influence. With more than 50% of today’s marriages ending in divorce, make this small investment in the longevity of your relationship. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. What’s stopping you? Start today.

5 Tips for Solving Marital Money Issues

Most marriages have their financial ups and downs. It can truly be a test to your relationship with your partner in dealing with the downs in particular. Here are some tips to help you deal with these situations in the quickest and calmest way possible.

Whether you and your spouse both work outside of the home, or one of you stays home with the children, it’s easy for one person to feel out of the financial picture. It’s important in a marriage to feel equal to your partner, on all levels of the playing field. Even if you don’t feel “stuck”, it’s important for couples to communicate openly about their financial situation, and try to better it together.

Most marriages have their financial ups and downs. It can truly be a test to your relationship with your partner in dealing with the downs in particular. Here are some tips to help you deal with these situations in the quickest and calmest way possible.

1.) Pick the Right Time. Find a non stress time to sit down and have a discussion with your partner. Me and my husband love to go on evenings out, because it gives us a chance to discuss important issues in a non stress environment. If you must stay home, make sure the kids are not present during the conversation.

2.) Come Prepared. Write down the matters you have been thinking about beforehand so that you can stay on track during your discussion.

3.) Don’t Get Emotional. Avoid personal attacks towards your spouse. Use “I” instead of “you” when speaking. Don’t be argumentative and state how you feel. Don’t point fingers, and don’t start a fight.

4.) Take Turns. Common courtesy will help you achieve your goals. Feeling equal to your partner will come with a general respect between you and your partner.

5.) Make a Plan. Discuss the situation and future plans with your spouse. Make sure you have a basic budget in place and discuss you and your partner’s vital steps in your financial future. Compile a money to-do list and check your progress often.

Remember the love you have for each other during the conversation, and listen
Also to what your partner has to say during the discussion. If it seems to be a bad time in general to talk about it, remember that there will be another opportunity to let your partner know how you feel. Let it go, and pick a better time in the future.

Tips to Save A Marriage

If your married life is in trouble, you should be able to understand the exact problem and then control the situation. Taking any harsh decision might be embarrassing for the personal and social status of the couple.

It doesn’t matter whether you are man or woman, whether you look after the kids or pay the bills, you should take initiative to resolve the problems in married life and maintain the relationships. This article provides information about some tips to save marriage and to maintain a healthy relationship.

If your marriage is in danger, try not to show your partner the tension or desperation you’re feeling. It will make him/her feel suffocated and your spouse will push you away. Always try to control your emotions and keep calm.

One thing to remember is that never beg for the return of your partner. Just show the depth of your passion that will make him/her to come back. One of the important tips to save marriage is to give the space to your partner. A little space may make the things much easier to deal with. Give time to do those things which make you feel good and strong about you. Spend some time with your friends and family. Do such things that increase your self-esteem.

Work to find out an area where both the partners can agree and be happy with the decisions. Always remember that the goal of a marriage is to help and support each other through sadness and happiness. Love is an important bridge in a married life that may keep the couple attached together. Show your passion to your partner in a new way everyday. Use romantic competition and games to get closer or you may send a romantic message to your partner.

One of the significant tips to save marriage is that you should understand each other very well. Then only, you will able to solve the problems in your married life without giving rise to conflicts. Your partner should be the first priority for you and you should know about the hobbies and interests of your partner. You can write a romantic poem or prepare a romantic meal or give a romantic gift to your partner.

Avoid continuously complaining about the small issues and try to ignore the unimportant things. If there is any serious issue that you are unsatisfied about, talk about it clearly. Have open discussions about it with your partner. Get ready for facing the challenges.

Jealousy may lead many couples to the divorce court. Hence, don’t ever be jealous about the professional and personal progress of your partner. Be honest to your partner and always have a strong belief in him/her.

If your partner is aggressive, you should be calm and keep your emotions in control. Be reasonable, rational and calm. Whenever you lose your temper during the arguments, you generally tend to say and do the things that you actually didn’t mean.

If your marriage is going bad, these tips to save marriage might be useful to bring it back to its previous loving partnership.

How to Save A Christian Marriage

If you are looking for ways on how to save a Christian marriage, then it is important for you to know that Christianity recommends resolving the problems in the marital life and saving a marriage by using your faith coupled with prayer.

There may be some problems in marriage which may be due to extra-martial affairs, adultery, infidelity, physical, verbal or emotional abuse. However, separation or divorce is not recommended in Christian marriage. Divorce can affect the life of both the partners at physical, emotional, financial, legal, spiritual and family levels.

If you are facing the same situation and wondering about how to save a Christian marriage, then you need not worry as you have various options. First of all, you need to talk to your partner and try to understand the problems in your married life. It is always better to seek the solutions by mutual understanding.

If the conflicts in your married life are because of ego, you should give away the ego and take an initiative to resolve the problems. Self-assessment is a very important step to save your marriage. Think about your mistakes and drawbacks and try to improve your behavior and avoid the things that may hurt your partner.

If you are determined to remain with your spouse forever and worried about how to save a Christian marriage, then you should opt for some changes in your behavior. If the problems in your married life are because of lack of communication, start to develop good communication between you and your partner. You should spend some time with each other and go for outing. You should express an intense passion for your partner because if you are successful in developing love for each other, then other problems can be immediately solved.

Infidelity is highly detrimental in a Christian marriage. You should avoid an extra-marital affair, by all means necessary. You should be very honest with your spouse and should completely trust him/her. If your partner is abusive, try to understand him/her and understand the causes of misbehavior of your spouse and find out the solutions for that.

If you are not able to resolve the problems, then you may seek advice from a faith bible believing minister or your friends, and family. Know that you are not alone, help can be found. Christianity believes in fidelity and if necessary you can take the help of married leaders from the church to counsel you or your spouse about what the bible has to say. Marriage counseling can help couples to improve their communication skills, find out their differences and clear all misunderstandings. The main ingredient which will always reign supreme is take it to God in Prayer he is waiting and listening. This is one of the best ways on how to save a Christian marriage.

Rejection in the Bedroom

3 Ways to Prevent Your Bedroom From Becoming a Mortuary

There are so many men who are dealing with being rejected in the bedroom by their wives. Instead of being a pleasure palace, your bedroom is becoming a mortuary. I’ve talked to so many men who have expressed their heart on this issue. This is an emotionally unhealthy place for a man to find himself. If you are in that position, you must turn your desire and need over to God during these times. God already knows how you feel and understands this is difficult to express in words because your soul is in agony.

As a man, you must know that your need for sex is real. You must deal with the reality of your situation and not fall into sinful lust. You must deny yourself of any other resource that could bring sexual pleasure. This is the time that, as a man, you must yield yourself before God and ask Him to prevent your bedroom from becoming a mortuary. Here are 3 ways to bring your bedroom back to life and ignite the flames of passion.

Take Your Prayer Life to the Next Level in the Bedroom

Your prayer life must intensify, and you literally must cry out to God. Ask Him to help you to continue to be the man He wants you to be. The movie, War Room exemplifies the true essence of implementing the Word of God within a marriage. In the movie, “Miss Clara” taught a wife how to go into her secret place to win the heart of her husband. Her secret place represented where she “went to war” spiritually.

As men, we can do the same thing. We must make a big, bold, and brave decision to do something we have never done before to turn things around so we can experience love like no other. As believers, I find that we have not been taught how to correlate the intimacy in our marriage to our prayer life with God. Sexual intercourse between a husband and wife is an act of worship. Husbands and wives must look at intimacy and sex as a unified weapon to destroy the schemes and wiles of the devil. The moment your bedroom becomes a mortuary, the devil wins. You must believe in intimacy to the degree that it makes you closer, not only in your marriage but in your walk with God.

Be Vulnerable with your Spouse in the Bedroom

As a man, can you be vulnerable for one minute and admit that you have been weakened because of rejection. This can cause your confidence and stamina to diminish for various reasons. When a man’s confidence has been stolen or damaged, it impacts his strength to go beyond the veil. He will not experience the maximum from that divine secret place of intimacy. I know that this is a hard truth to face because it lowers your self-esteem. What man wants to humble himself to confess that his self-esteem has been diminished? A real man who is ready to ignite the flames of passion once again can make this confession.

To do so, you must be transparent. If you want to prevent your bedroom from becoming a mortuary, be quick to share your feelings with your spouse. Time is of the essence so don’t bottle up your emotions. This can lead to anger and frustration. Admitting that something is bothering you will help you address the problem immediately, and your spouse will see your attempt at honesty. The more vulnerable you can become the more you can be yourself. In return, it will aid in forming more of an emotional connection with your spouse. Your bedroom should be a haven a place of refuge. Some things don’t just happen. They must be created.

Respect and Serve Unconditionally in the Bedroom

Intimacy and sex can be magnified as though it is the ultimate encounter a man needs. Although it is a need, it is not the main ingredient. The main ingredient for a man is respect. He is made to receive respect, especially from his wife.

A wife respecting her husband exemplifies her trust in his ability to provide leadership. Within the protection lies provision for a man. As the wife shows respect, she is providing the husband emotional stability. Despite our downfalls, her respect makes her man feel good about himself. Every man recognizes that he has feelings and he must be allowed to acknowledge that respect “kneads” those feelings.

A husband and wife must die to self for his/her spouse to live. One reason a marriage is put together by God is for each person to meet the sexual need of the other. You must make your place of intimacy with the mindset that it is not about you. Unavoidably, there are times that you’re going to be tired and just don’t feel like sacrificing for the other person. However, a marriage requires really giving your all to serve your spouse by meeting each other’s needs on your own without seeming as if it’s a duty.